Song of Solomon is a very short book with only eight chapters, but J. Vernon McGee called it “the most neglected book of the Bible.”

Many see this book as an allegory of Jesus Christ and the church because we’re called the bride of Christ (see Ephesians 5:25). And that might have some application, because God wants a relationship of intimacy with us.

But I see it primarily as literal. It's a husband and wife—Solomon and a woman called the Shulamite bride. It’s highly probable this was Solomon's first wife and his truest love.

In fact, this reflects God's original intent: “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh” (Mark 10:7-8).

Throughout the book, the reader is instructed three times to “not stir up nor awaken love until it pleases” (2:7; see also 3:5, 8:4). Though you may have a longing, you've got to keep that passion in check. Physical expression of love has its place but shouldn’t be aroused prematurely.

Solomon referred to his bride as “a garden enclosed” and “a fountain sealed” (4:12). In other words, she was closed off to everyone else—she was saving herself for marriage.

So here’s the irreducible truth about God’s will for marriage relationships: Abstinence until marriage, fidelity within marriage, then the enjoyment of marriage.

Abstain until you get married. Then stay faithful while you’re in that marriage. And enjoy each other fully in the context of that marriage. “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality” (1 Thessalonians 4:3).

It’s important to acknowledge that sexual desire is given to us by God. We’re hardwired to be physically attracted and to be intimately satisfied in a physical manner. That is God-given.

But as this desire is God-given, it must also be God-guided. It’s beautiful within its context.

In Proverbs 5, Solomon used a different metaphor for this idea. He said, “Drink water from your own cistern, and running water from your own well. Should your fountains be dispersed abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be only your own, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth” (vv. 15-18).

Sex within the context of marriage is like drinking pure water from a clear well. But sexual sin is like drinking polluted water from a sewer. One will delight you and the other will destroy you. One is a river and the other is a swamp.

I think we can all agree that the Creator of love and desire is the One who knows best how it can bless us.